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Friday, October 29, 2010

@Asaf and (Im)mobility

The heat descended upon the desert surrounded by ochre mountains in a slow flood. Still, the landscape lay motionless under a heavy heat and wide sky. Open eyes afforded a glimpse of asphalt, broken vehicles, sun and cacti that had melted to the contours of the windswept sand, like melted wax. Distant heat waves boiled the sand into bubbles towards the sky; the sky dripped its blue onto the sand below. The world was a canvas oozing in blue and beige. Motion had long abandoned his body in search of an oasis beyond. The heat threw his body into tidal swells of sweat that lapped against air around.
The membrane of skin and sky vibrated in a friction that sent his bones into a hum. He stood in a skeletal stillness to listen, however curiosity soon turned to fear as he realized he was precariously teetering upon a latticework of brittle bones. He was paralyzed by the thought that the spines and cords that gave him shape would pierce his flesh and throw him into shapelessness. Immobility was no longer for leisure, it was now for survival; he found new motion in the twitch and scan of his eyes. The landscape bubbled, as the final traces of latent motion spasmed from under stones and underground crevices.
A ribcage sizzled on the sand, sending streams of ivory into the air that congealed into a white plastic chair. He sat and wondered about matter and mirage. The exchange continued, as his sweat met and slowly melted the chair. Eternity became imminent. Time became a tempo counted at the rate of a lazy train of thoughts. The world assumed direction authored in sweat drop streams punctuated by trails over freckles and scabs.
In this eternity the landscape became a canvas; fine art on a white museum wall. Where movement and locomotion appeared in phantom quivers and whispers. Like distant memories the accidental brush of a strangers hand, the scent of an orange peel torn in a crowded room. The world vibrated on the periphery of his sight, but nothing could escape his perspective. Even himself, he too was an aspect, a quality of the scene; the thought of himself looking at the canvas on the white museum wall superseded his sense of sight, and became his sight.
Although he was noticed only as a small misshapen drop upon the canvas, the body glowed and paled in an ember that burnt the pigment from the paint.He sunk lower and lower into the serenity of immobility, in the comfort of a bath of warm melting wax. The chair drooped sending his glance above. He saw a bird that had been long overtaken by the flooding freeze. Like him, the bird had chosen this stale state; anything that could twitch a muscle into motion could have escaped this lackadaisical landscape. Earlier the bird had followed its hunger; trailing a body lost and burning in a slow desert ramble to pick at the bones of its assured destiny. Interrupted by the lullaby, the bird floated motionless. It was, as a silhouette in the sky, a finch, and as a shadow on the sand, a vulture. The world had finally lapsed into indecision it vibrated in the friction of myth and sight.
He sat and swayed upon the strands of the white plastic chair that had melted into more of a hammock above the glittering sand. The melting polymers moved in vibrations that dripped from the tips of just-hardened ivory tendrils. The melt was caught in inertia, caught in the crest of a wave approaching a shore, releasing stores of motion that bubbled to the sandy surface and tapped the landscape into a gentle sway.
His eyes winced, as he burrowed his sight deep into the horizon, he clarified the hum of motion that was being released in a thousand squeals and screams beneath him. As the pigments melted and blended, his sight began to return as colors moved and mixed, that gave him a heavy sense of seasickness. He shook his head, and sight into motion, his gentle gaze sent the world into sway according to a common spasm, which settled as the tendons in his eyes tightened and pulled the blurs into focus. Shrubs and stones leached hues and shades from mineral waters that churned below the sandy surface. Skins and skeletons swelled and sweat, dripped as blue paint drops onto the sky, as oil streams congealed into wandering highways. Soon his jaw dropped and diaphragm swelled as the gentle breeze flowed like a coastal current into his lungs. The shake sent the sun in a circle around the globe, sending him hurling upon the destinies of remote desert highways.
A person filled with hope
Walked into the office today
Two smiles before lunch;
They knew that something good would
Bookend the grief we’ve been feeling

I tried to connect
Swore up and down
Or rather, that down was up
And then went back to pretending in earnest

And within earshot, I caught the whispers
Of the cold breeze tickling the waters of the Bay
Into waves
Magnified from an airplane
And blocking out the mumbles
I left my office for a northward tower
Adding another two smiles
For after lunch

Thursday, October 28, 2010

On a Good Day

You sounded funny to me
Unlike yourself, I thought
Your brown eyes couldn’t meet my blues
So I thought of others

For the first time I noticed the land
We sat in the dirt and compared it to
Palestine
But what do I know?
I only know that
The dirt will stay as long as
We keep looking down at it
Instead of at each other
We are all crazies. We are all crazies up until the point when it works — then we become heroes. Too many wise people in the world. Millions exchanging success for lessons. It’s not worth a lesson. I actually want what I work for. A lesson is like a party favor. It’s nice, but you still have to go home.



By Maurice Diesendruck

Wednesday, October 27, 2010

For Mona

Hey Mona, you sure looked heavy in high def last night hanging around the Louvre. You smirked that pixelated smile, you made my eyes cry wild, staring at you through the Japanese lens of the careless Italian cameraman. Auto-focused, auto-shot, you ought to be shot and saved away for good next to the perfectly framed yet slightly off tilted snaps of Venus, Vermeer, and Veronica, his fiance and beauty beau who drove our cameraman, ol' Leonardo for love's sake to muse in the Louvre.

And here in the Louvre for love do I pine to peer to take my Mona dear using ol' Leonardo's lens. Framing the fame in an instant of time line by pixelated line before memory snaps her out out and away. Pray Mona imprint on the chip of my heart or at least until my software saves. For Mona sublime forsook my weary mind in the twinkling of Leonardo's Asian eye while he, dumpy Veronica, his future wife, and their fake Italian love block me from the real thing.



By

Emilio Ortega Aldrich

Intersectionality: It’s Killing Me!

i got a fat tongue
mutilate spanish like a gringo guey
granddaddy bromisalva
born down warsaw’s way
mama’s mecha hair
made papa’s knees drop
she renigged on the sex
till his circumsion popped
way down below
a grove of riverside’s navel trees
mi judio papa loving
how latinas bent to their knees
a broken condom later
many miscarried contraceptions too
they gave birth to me
howdy doo baby boy howdy doo to you

but in this America town
in obamas red light
I taste olive for a peach
Or look furry like the reich
who gave ol’ man bromislava
his red line one way ticket
so a grandson could meet
the latin lengua who’d stick it
im not brown
im not white
im smoky
like the night
the world
ain’t color blind
no it labels me
for spite.





By

Emilio Ortega Aldrich

The Glow Pt. 3

In the ghetto, a wall might mean anything
But don’t ask me
Because I am not of the ghetto
Even if, by chance, my bloodline
Still exists beneath its rubble

They documented my suffering, though I cannot claim it as my own
Kept it away until the final moments when the barren landscape could be used
For the parades of charlatans
Not of murderers
For it is their pride that keeps the bloodstains moist

If not Diaspora, then I am finished
My story evaporates like the fumes
Exhumed like the ashes you’ve read about
Over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over again
You sat at your desk, avoiding the glow
Wondering whether you could ever become such a cruel thing
You are cruel enough, you said aloud
I heard it and wouldn’t stop listening

You sat and thought about the boy you loved
And the girl you tortured
And, try as you might, those memories would just not greet each other warmly
Would not meet across the hallway for a handshake or the embrace
Or fall in love carelessly, painlessly
Because bloodlines are now cut wide open, veins and all

And as the ashes rise again
With the whirlwind wind,
You might recall your blood
And the wall it still stains
At least until you turn out your light.
man on bart
The subway was hot, and I was tired. In no mood to join the motions of the crowds around me, I looked for stillness. Space and light gasped for air in the shuffle of people around, searching for a parted leg or a raised arm. I looked for these pockets of peace to rest my eyes and mind. I was beneath and between.
It was a violent endeavor as these atmospheres collapsed in the volatility of movement around, this search was rapid and in these spaces I found stillness, a state that transcended the physical constraints of the moment. The subway burrowed deep through industrial earth, dark and decaying. As it penetrated deep into the darkness, it continued with the utmost confidence towards an inevitable destiny that had been previously programmed within.
The lights sanitized the passengers in a bath of green florescence to protect us from the depth and possible deathly disease that may seep in from the outside. The light illuminated the terrain that we were falling through. The rust and the shadows fell like flesh upon the cold concrete walls while electric cables floated in the atmosphere of exhaust and fermentations.
This passed so quickly as the train picked up speed, and soon it gave up its form and merged into a rolling film across the windows. From brown to grey to black to deep green it morphed before me, for me. And in front of this rolling spectrum I made out the form of a man, who slowly began to emerge from a stain on the wall.
He was dressed in drab, cubicle clothing that fell along certain geometrical contours that made me question if a body really lay beneath. It seemed as if he had clothed himself with shavings from the dirty, dark walls outside. He sat still and exuded eternity, like heavy machinery in an abandoned industrial warehouse. His body slumped and belly bloated with a head that rolled like a marble in the bowl of his concaved neck. His hair was sparse and seemed to have been collected from the fallen dust and follicles on the floor.
His dark eyes were swollen and their lead glassy weight pulled his face downward, searching for expressionlessness. A monolith amidst men condemned to motion. He sat so heavy, he had time. The train jolted and tossed some of the passengers off of their balance, which again shuffled the spaces between, giving me new openings to seek and sit.
But the man sat, still unaffected. I had a vision that this man was built into the mechanics of the shrieking subway car and would follow it to its logical end, on these tracks. He would either slow down at the end of the line where he would eventually rust into the earth, or in a violent crash he would remain still, a moment of peace amidst the last mayhem of many.
I imagined him dreaming of alternatives, of him escaping from the seat, the subway and the subterranean and to find himself above, away from the still, stale air, the density of the atmosphere below that allowed him to congeal as pieces into a person. But my vision found its tracks, as I saw him smile at the sight of sun and sky while his form found a delicacy that would disintegrate upon the slightest breeze.
I do not like to leave parts of my body behind
somehow it feels unfair and
it tastes bitter
like the white powder that coats the pills which contain the drugs

relegated insensible by these prescribed chemical stupifiers

despite their work
it never leaves the tip of my tongue nor the back of my mind

the name of my limb

______    ________    


but my limb, for it is not currently a

scarcely dangles vertically

I move like a seasoned pirate with the grace of a forklift—

almost like the last phase of man from the Sphinx’s riddle

blood metamorphosing my toes into pomegranates
whenever I wait for the teapot to boil

like the serpent I am mandated a horizontal experience

my head, my heart, my body forming a halcyon plateau
and the beautiful people around me are

mountains with snowy peaks

kaleidoscopic clouds

purple rather than blue

my limb suspended in the alpine air wedged between two jagged cliffs
but unlike my old tent and tarp, the seems are not bursting
sinuous threads of flesh resolutely committed to undo the doctor’s deed

covered with the mineral deposits that conceal the buried dinosaur bones

cold like the side of the moon we never see

and in the imposed blindness the threads throb harder then any music I can think of playing

erratic electric pulses turning my veins into squirrel’s tightropes

my body’s compartments greedily absorbing the concentrated stimulus

that reflects back from my tenaciously healing limb

until the faintest beat calls my name and my heart and limb become one

as the plateau that was my cradle

now becomes fertile enough for roots

Tuesday, October 26, 2010

בסופו של דבר

כשהתבוננתי בלוח השנה
תהיתי
כי הבנתי שעוד לא התבגרתי
שחייתי יותר מחמישית מאה
כאילו כלום
ולא שההזדקנות חלפה בלי הרגש
אלה שהבשלת המהות
כמעת ולא נגעה בי

וכשסוף סוף תפסתי מה קורה
אצבעותיי החרוכות הזדקרו
והראייה נחלשה
וכבר לא הייתי מסוגל להרדם
בלי לפחד ששוב פעם אפספס

Monday, October 25, 2010

Little

I am writing
So little these days
The reasoning not always lucid
The heart not always in it

It
Skips

When the faces of strangers
Remind me of you
I am reminded of why I am writing
So little these days

Sunday, October 24, 2010

The heat descended upon the desert surrounded by ochre mountains in a slow flood. Still, the landscape lay motionless under a heavy heat and wide sky. Open eyes afforded a glimpse of asphalt, broken vehicles, sun and cacti that had melted to the contours of the windswept sand, like melted wax. Distant heat waves boiled the sand into bubbles towards the sky; the sky dripped its blue onto the sand below. The world was a canvas oozing in blue and beige. Motion had long abandoned his body in search of an oasis beyond. The heat threw his body into tidal swells of sweat that lapped against the air around.
The membrane of skin and sky vibrated in a friction that sent his bones into a hum. He stood in a skeletal stillness to listen, however curiosity soon turned to fear as he realized he was precariously teetering upon a lattice of brittle bones. He was paralyzed by the thought that the spines and cords that gave him shape would pierce his flesh and throw him into shapelessness. Immobility was no longer for leisure, it was now for survival; he found new motion in the twitch and scan of his eyes. The landscape bubbled, as the final traces of latent motion spasmed from under stones and underground crevices.
A ribcage sizzled on the sand, sending streams of ivory into the air that congealed into a white plastic chair. He sat and wondered about matter and mirage. The exchange continued, as his sweat met and slowly melted the chair. Eternity became imminent. Time became a tempo counted at the rate of a lazy train of thoughts. The world assumed direction authored in sweat drop streams punctuated by trails over freckles and scabs.
In this eternity the landscape became a canvas; fine art on a white museum wall. Where movement and locomotion appeared in phantom quivers and whispers. Like distant memories the accidental brush of a strangers hand, the scent of an orange peel torn in a crowded room. The world vibrated on the periphery of his sight, but nothing could escape his perspective. Even himself, he too was an aspect, a quality of the scene; the thought of himself looking at the canvas on the white museum wall superseded his sense of sight, and became his sight. Although he was noticed only as a small misshapen drop upon the canvas, the body glowed and paled in an ember that burnt the pigment from the paint.
He sunk lower and lower into the serenity of immobility, in the comfort of a bath of warm melting wax. The chair drooped sending his glance above. He saw a bird that had been long overtaken by the flooding freeze. Like him, the bird had chosen this stale state; anything that could twitch a muscle into motion could have escaped this lackadaisical landscape. Earlier the bird had followed its hunger; trailing a body lost and burning in a slow desert ramble to pick at the bones of its assured destiny. Interrupted by the lullaby, the bird floated motionless. It was, as a silhouette in the sky, a finch, and as a shadow on the sand, a vulture. The world had finally lapsed into indecision it vibrated in the friction of myth and sight.
He sat and swayed upon the strands of the white plastic chair that had melted into more of a hammock above the glittering sand. The melting polymers moved in vibrations that dripped from the tips of just-hardened ivory tendrils. The melt was caught in inertia, caught in the crest of a wave approaching a shore, releasing stores of motion that bubbled to the sandy surface and tapped the landscape into a gentle sway.
His eyes winced, as he burrowed his sight deep into the horizon, he clarified the hum of motion that was being released in a thousand squeals and screams beneath him. As the pigments melted and blended, his sight began to return as colors moved and mixed, that gave him a heavy sense of seasickness. He shook his head, and sight into motion, his gentle gaze sent the world into sway according to a common spasm, which settled as the tendons in his eyes tightened and pulled the blurs into focus. Shrubs and stones leached hues and shades from mineral waters that churned below the sandy surface. Skins and skeletons swelled and sweat, dripped as blue paint drops onto the sky, as oil streams congealed into wandering highways. Soon his jaw dropped and diaphragm swelled as the gentle breeze flowed like a coastal current into his lungs. The shake sent the sun in a circle around the globe, sending him hurling upon the destinies of remote desert highways.

Friday, October 22, 2010

Berkeley

On a Berkeley slope

On a clear day

I watch fruit slip off the branches

The wind carrying the sand in a way

That kisses the bark

And how the fruit glides softly until it reaches

My toe

Stopping me, each time

From coming clean


It could have been 2010

Or 1997

It could have been my lover

Or my parents

And their lovers

It could have been Berkeley

Or Haifa

Or a sixteen hour flight

Or the shed in my backyard

Long replaced by something much stronger

Than love

Wednesday, October 20, 2010

עיר עמים

עיר פנים
עיר מפונים
עיר מופנמים
עיר מופנמת
עיר עמים עיר דורות
פני העיר החדשה, הישנה
פנים, לאן אתן מסתכלות?
אתן מסתכלות או שמסתכלות עלייכן או אליכן
אני בוחר לעומק, אם כי לא כולם
פנים, מה יש לראות בפנים?
מאמץ מאמץ מאמץ
נשימה
רק שלא יראו או שלפחות לא יבינו מה ראו
אני מטשטש מראית פנים זווית פנים
עיניים קרות
נשמה
פנים מה קרה לכן?
חצבו בכן או חצבו לנגד עיניכם
ומה הוציאו ומה נשאר לשים בפה
כי שם חבוי גם בלי שטעים, בלי שמזין
אבל זהירות כי גז מדמיע הוא סוכן סמוי
שפותח כל פה, שעוצם כל עין
חוץ מאלה שהתרגלו
הם כבר לא חלק מפני העיר
כאב שלא מופנם נעלם בעיר הזאת
זה כאב אנטי-עממי, ולכם פנים, בכלל אין דורות ואין תולדות
אתם יכולים להמציא ואולי גם נקשיב
אבל רק בחצי אוזן כי האוזן היא בצד של הפנים
האוזן לא חזותית, או אסטתית
וזו היא עיר חזותית
הכל אותו דבר פה
אותו צבע אותו אותו אותו,
שום דבר בעצם
איזה פנים אתה מסתיר ואיזה אני?